I'm so tired nowadays. Seriously, i always seem to be lacking of sleep, there always seems to be something that needs to be done, my planner lists one meeting after another...and materials that need to be studied keep piling up.

I think that i may have bitten off more than i can chew. Tapi Prof.Latiff always says and my sister always reminds me that ' A Muslim never rests until he/she is in the grave' and i do think that too a certain point all these things i'm involved in are important to me and for me.

But when you have too many of these stuff, you kind of have to start prioritizing. And i think I've a least let one very important responsibility of mine slip by, and it's been bugging me for the last few weeks.

So i decided it was time for some spring cleaning.And so i made a list. And i scratched out some things from the list. And i do feel a bit better, if only a bit.

p.s I failed for the very first time. Hemato dapat 48. Bayangkanlah, 85% of the class failed. When the failure rate is that high, i have to say, i don't think the problem lies with the students...But back on the subject of me failing for the first time, i'm proud to say i didn't go into shock or anything :p

p.p.s I went for the ESQ leadership training. I found the content refreshing, interesting and definitely the best among any motivation/ leadership courses ive been to so far. But the way they decided to present the information...let's just say at times i felt traumatized + horrified. Tapi kite amik dgn kite bende yg baik saja, n there were loads of good stuff to learn from this programme.

p.p.p.s I'm getting tired of placing my confidence and giving my support to certain people. Rasenye cam lately, i've been making up too many excuses to cover their faults.

Randoms

I read about the 'cow-head' demonstration thingy everyday and it angers and embarrasses me how stupid and ignorant some people are. How some people claim they know Islam yet do stuff that is totally against what it teaches. Watching the council meeting video and Hishamuddin's press conference i'm only left with disgust and a certain sense of sadness.

We talked about tolerance that day. Because we see less and less of it being practiced. And i don't agree with what you think. That tolerating something you don't agree with means being weak, giving in.

(Fight in the cause of Allah those who fight you, but do not transgress limits; for Allah loves not transgressors) (Al-Baqarah 2:190)

Intermission

I haven't written in ages. Not because i have nothing to say but i'm having trouble sorting out my thoughts - and there are so many of them going through my mind.

Trust me to use the few hours before my final exam to sneak in a post :p. This is so weird - I'm feeling relaxed and happy...yet the numerous papers strewn around my mattress signals to me that I'm not supposed to. My mind is definitely not on this final exam.

You know, it's so weird ~ this block has been one of the most challenging ones so far, what with the missed classes, the asthma attacks, the added tasks tapi I think it would be hard for me to pinpoint a day where i didn't go to bed feeling happy.I guess while i had all these other things that were seemingly bringing me up, i also had a myriad of other things that were boosting me up :) As usual, God works in mysterious ways.

This recent phase of complacency is a bit troubling tapi some people tell me it's a good thing for me.

So much to say! But i should stop now.

p.s My mum datang esok!